FINDING TRUE LOVE IN A WORLD OF ROMANCE

Sunset. walks. Talks. Drives in the countryside. Holding hands. Soft music. Its all part of romance. Just the sound of the word rouses hopes and recalls memories. There is a natural longing for romance for us.

After romance, the logical progression is to love. Above everything else that’s what we all desire—to love and be loved, cared for and appreciated.
But are love and romance synonymous?
Many find romance. not so many find love, i mean real love or what you can call true love. Why should that be?

Plainly put, too many of us have lived in a fantasy world so long we don’t even know what love is.
Some think love as a feeling, a tingling emotion. It is something spoken or the physical attraction for a member of the opposite sex.
Most people’s perception of love and romance comes from music, novels (mostly by females), television or movies. But what is depicted there is not reality of everyday living. The portrayed romance in a movie is far different from what we see in real life.
We have the meaning of love and romance all mixed up. Love goes far beyond attraction. It is not based on appearance. It is not the feeling or excitement of physical passion. It is not what one receives.
And there is the key. Love is not what you get—IT IS WHAT YOU GIVE! It is thoughtfulness, concern, and sensitivity to the need of another.
From what is common today, when a man and woman begin to see each other and become romantically attracted, what often follows is the verbalization of the word, “I love you”
The question is, do they?
Honestly, most don’t.
Usually they are teenagers and too young to even comprehend the meaning of love.
What they mistake as “love” is really romantic attraction.
The sentence “I am romantically inclined to you” is not used among. This is in no way romantic.
They certainly don’t say, “I lust after you”, for lust in romance as i know is the direct opposite of love. And the truth is, so much “young love” is—lust. It is for one’s own sensual pleasure—not real love.
Love isn’t something that happens suddenly. Romance may appear out of nowhere—but real love takes time. It must be proved. It may begin small. But true love grows. And it has no end.
Romance, especially when love is absent, will surely fade.
The real determination of love is when love is tested, that’s when we will understand the difference.
There is a story told by James Dobson about a young married couple who appeared to be very much in love. The attractive young woman in Dr. Dobson’s story developed a tumour on her face that required surgery. After exploring all options, together with the consequences, they finally chose to have the surgery.
The operation was successfully completed. After the surgery, her face remained bandaged for several days. In the meantime, the doctor had informed her that a complications had arisen. There was no way to have removed the tumour without severing a nerve in her face, which might leave her permanently disfigured. And that was what happened. One side of her mouth was pulled outwards and down. Plainly put, she would not be the physically beautiful person she once was.
Of course she was devastated. Then she worried whether her husband would still be attracted to her. Would he still love her as before?
The day came to remove the bandages. The calming voice of the doctor had only partially prepared them for what was to come.
When she saw in the mirror her now disfigured mouth, she began to weep and looked anxiously for her husband’s reaction. It was then she knew why she was so thankful for him and she would never have to worry about his love.
His reaction was ever so simple. He held her hand and said, “On you it’s kind of cute. I like it.”
You see, love isn’t the feeling we get from another, it is the feeling we give to another. That young husband had certainly been romantically attracted to his wife. But his love for her far exceeded personal appearance. He had taken her as his wife, to care for her—to love her, for better and for worse. Nothing would ever change that.